Role of father in the life of a child

It is well known fact to all that the role of the family is very important in the upbringing of the child. In that the importance of the role played by the mother and the father is considered to be more effective and long lasting because the mother and the father have an impact on the life of the child in both situations, that is before and after the child is born.A lot has been written(and rightly so) about the importance of the mother in the life of a child but not much credit is given to the part played by the father.There may be different reasons for that but one reason might be because the mother remains closer to the child than the father and due to which most of the daily needs are taken care of by her. Also in the earlier days, the father used to be out to earn for the family and had little time to be with family which created the perception that the mother is more important than the father in the upbringing of  a child. The fact is that both, the mother and the father, play an important role in the formative years of the child and even after that. Over a period of time the father has been made synonymous to someone whom the children should fear and it is because of him only that the children would be disciplined. At times it appears true, but in most of the cases the father cares for the child and love him/her as the mother does.This is true that the children are afraid of their father and convey most of their feelings through the mother and now it depends upon her how she conveys that to the father.The role of mother many-a- times, becomes of the mediator between the child and the father.But all should understand that father should not be projected as someone whom the children should be afraid of.  The children should not be scared by the statement that if this work is not done, it will be reported to the father.Sometimes when the father comes from the office or some other work he might be stressed due to some reason and the moment he enters the home he is conveyed about the unfavourable deeds of the child  at home or in the school. As the father is already very disturbed and without realising that his negative reaction might disturb the child, reacts negatively and if it happens often, then the image of the father is tarnished in the eyes of the child and he/she carries the same perception through the life, though the reality is this that in majority of the cases the father likes the child as much as the mother does.Here I would like to suggest to all the fathers not to pass on your stress and the problems of the office to your child.Everyone understand your problems but that innocent child who might be waiting for you for quite long does not really know about that. When you are doing so much for the family at least give some quality time to your child. Children around are so full of life, energy and agility that they become a source to reduce your stress if you deal with them patiently.
The situation has changed now because both the parents are working in most of the cases hence the role to be played by the father has also undergone a major change and now he is not the tool to make children afraid of him but more of a support because the mother is also spending sometime away from the child.The father has to fill that vacuum created by the absence of the mother because if that is not done then somebody else will fill that space and this may not be done by the virtuous people always and ultimately the child and the parents both will suffer.
It has been observed that generally the elder child is introvert and the younger one is extrovert though both are born in the same family to the same parents and might have gone to the same school. One behaves almost opposite to the other (exceptions are always possible). The educationist and the psychologists have tried to understand and analyse. They have their own theory but what I have observed is that, in case when the first child is born the parents are young and are in the process of establishing themselves ,in the process they are likely to ignore the child or may not react to him/her in a positive manner because of their own stress and pressure. By the time second child is born the parents are almost settled in their field of work and are able to give quality time to the child. Now sometimes, the elder starts feeling that the parents like the younger one more than him/her and this happens more for the father than the mother.The father does not do it knowingly but it happens unintentionally and that makes an impact on the personality of the elder child.
So, this is very important for the father and the mother both that the children should be exposed to the positive environment irrespective of whatever is the situation of the family.The mothers are also requested to ensure that the role of the father is no less important and this feeling should be inculcated in the children.After all father is the head of the family and he should be loved and respected equally by all the members of the family, particularly the children.He may be harsh at times but he is never hard- hearted,he is as humble and as soft as the mother is,but all you need to do is to understand him and give him due importance.