Shocking but real

While writing about the problems of the children from the affluent families, I thought that these are many problems related to the expectations of the parents which are responsible for the negative behavior of the children and that seems to be true as shared by the children and the teachers.While discussing the same with a responsible person, I came across a shocking but a real incident which took place in one of the upcoming cities of the country.The incident is related to the mother of a child who was very disturbed because of the action and nature a close friend of her son. The child belongs to a so called good family because the parents are educated and working in a good company.The worried mother also belongs to a good family .One day she had invited the friends of her son to some function at home.As a good host, she asked the kids what drink they would like to have (she meant the soft drinks) and one of the kids asked for some hard drink(I am not writing the name of the drink).This came as a thunderclap and the host was at shock as to how could a child of six-seven years age, know about it.She tried to let it go by ignoring the child`s request. Later on the same child told the lady that he had tasted that drink with his father.The concerned lady is very much worried not only for this child but more about her own son because he is a good friend of the other child and might get influenced by him.She does not know how to react to such situation and how to handle the same.My advise to the lady has been that she should talk to the parents of the affected to child and convey the same to them. If they do not help her she should counsel her own son against the use of such drinks.She should talk more to him about the ill effects of such things.The father of the child should also be careful of not getting indulged in such things if he has been doing so,because only words and  lecture would not make any difference but the examples will.This may seem to be one odd case but the reality is different.In the name of freedom and modernisation some of the parents are teaching wrong things to their children which do not harm them only but influence other children also.
Another incident is related to a child who has not been behaving well in the class and also bus while commuting to and fro the school.He has been troubling other children right from the age of four or five and the school in which he is studying has tried its level best to help and improve that child. Now he has grown up and is studying in middle school.At times he becomes very violent and when asked why did he do so, the prompt answer is the other children made him to do that. He very honestly admits that he gets angry for very small things.When one of the teachers visited his house to understand his problems, along with other things one important observation was made by her.During the informal discussion the mother told that her son was not behaving in the right manner at home also.She told that one day when she was asleep, the child came and woke her up.She felt very bad and scolded him because there was no reason for him to disturb her. Now to teach him a lesson the mother did the same to the child next day.Is it not once again shocking that a mother was playing a tit for tat game?Does it not prove that the habits of the child were formed at home due to such incidents taking place and that is the reason he gets irritated very soon and retaliates immediately in negative manner?
These two incidents make us to believe that good and healthy  parenting is very important for the personality of the children.When I shared this with the senior students of our school they were shocked and wanted me to share it with all.The reason of sharing it with them was that they were in the process of constituting a disciplinary committee in the school which could take care of the disciplinary problems of the children in the school.I wanted to caution them that punishment to such children may not help but understanding the root cause of the problem was very important so that such children could be helped to overcome the problem. Punishment should be the last option when all others means are exhausted.All teachers and the  fortunate parents of the well behaved children can help and contribute in making the other group of the children well behaved in place of criticising them all the time.Criticism,demeaning and denigration will rather make them more disappointed and gloomy.The issue of anomalous behaviour can only be tackled with understanding,patience and affection shown to these children.To curb or uproot this problem all the stakeholders will have to join the hands and give a whole-hearted support.