Role model for the children

It has been accepted by all that the children learn the most by the environment they are exposed to. There are many factors which affect the personality of the child. The family and the schools play a very important role. We come across many cases where the children may not be behaving in an appropriate way. The teachers are heard saying that despite their best efforts a particular child of the class could not be changed for better. The children might be having problems of different kind but the most common of them are not telling the truth, misbehavior with other children, not completing the given task etc. There may be some other problems which the teachers and the parents come across on every day basis, which may not be due to the fault of the parents, teachers or the children. But when it comes to not telling the truth or bullying etc., then the children may not be directly responsible for that because all this they might have picked up from the elders at home or in the school. I mentioned about the same earlier also but have been forced to remind all because of an incident which took place recently. A young mother had taken two of her very young kids to the barber shop for their haircut. The elder child would have been about four years old and the younger one about a year and half. It was evening time, may be around 6 pm and the elder child was very keen to go out of the shop and play with his friends but the mother was persuading him to get a particular type of the haircut which is very much in fashion because of the popularity of a particular model. The child was not very much impressed and wanted to get away by requesting the mother to allow him with the kind of haircut he was given. When the child did not get convinced, the mother said OK but he was supposed to wait till the younger one could get the proper haircut. The elder child said that he could get the same next day. The mother very easily said that the shop would remain closed the next day (which was not the case). Now this was the turn of the second child to sit in the chair for a particular kind of haircut (he would not know what is in fashion and what is outdated but the mother was insisting upon a particular way only). As the child was crying the mother kept telling him many things which were not true. One of them was “ do not cry otherwise the uncle will get angry, stop moving otherwise a dog will come and bite you” and many more like this. The other child was also listening to all this and must have realized that the mother was telling all lie to make the younger one quiet. She appeared to be an educated lady and the elder child must have been going to a school because in between name of the teacher was also used. Now the question is, whether this was an isolated case or it happens so many times in a day with parents. All would remember that the children are asked to tell a lie if the father is not keen to answer a phone call. The children get exposed to many situations which the parents do not otherwise want them to get exposed. Sometimes we elders speak bad language while talking to someone over telephone or even face to face as well. At that time we forget that our children may be around them and would be listening and seeing the things being done by them. In the schools also the children get exposed to such things though it might not have been done by the teachers deliberately. Some children have shared it with the headmasters/headmistress that some of the teachers discuss some negatives about other teachers while standing near the doors of the classroom. It must not have happened with most of the teachers but even if there are a few like that it is not good for the children. Not even a single teacher or the family member has the liberty of exposing the children to anything which might affect them negatively. The children become what they are exposed to and our responsibility as parents and  teachers is much more than anybody else. If we shall take care of such things then our children would not get affected by the kind of the language being used by many leaders of different political parties of the country. We need to understand that a human being cannot live alone and if we have to live in groups as a society then we must learn to accommodate others and compromise on certain issues keeping in mind the feelings and respect of others also. Our children, when they are young, follow their parents and the teachers as they consider them as their role models. Though they would be affected and influenced by others at a later stage but the basic impact which they got in their childhood would impress them the most. My advice to all parents and the teachers would be that the children should not to be exposed to any negative feeling and they should not be told a lie whatever may the compulsions be. Facing the truth by self and the children would prove to be beneficial in the long run which will make this world a better place for all of us. The example of the young mother I shared with you all is not the isolated case because it happens with most of us though nobody wants to do it deliberately. We should always be careful in actions and the speech, particularly when the children are around us. This will help the children as well as the adults because many of our problems will be solved when we are honest to ourselves and the people around us. Though it may appear to be a difficult task but definitely not an impossible one especially in case when this helps our children learn better things and imbibe values which will prove to be good to everyone. Let us all try to be as honest as possible especially when the children are around us.Taking into consideration the fact that children imitate the elders,their role models(people around them) should be creative with a high moral scale,hardworking,organised and virtuous, for a positive psycho-social development of their personality.