Monday, August 11, 2014

Empowering women to witness change



The newspaper reports which keep appearing on almost daily basis related to the crime against women are very disturbing and are appalling for the society in the 21st century. More disturbing are the reasons cited by many people specially dressing of the women and other things including their going out in the night or doing certain things which till date were considered to be the sole right of men only. The question which has been asked is - what is the fault of a girl child who is five or ten years of age?  We need an answer for this. She does not wear that type of clothes which many people find provocative. Though the government has tried its level best to curb this menace but it seems to be having an opposite effect. The media does play its role by reporting such incidents but that too get carried away by some high profile cases and in this process the sufferings of many women is lost in the void because they are not reported so intensely as the high profile cases are.  Though the status of women in the society appears to have improved but the reality is different. The literacy rate among the women is much better than when India got independence. This should have made the difference in the attitude of the society towards the women folk but has that really happened? I might be considered to be pessimistic but just for the sake of not being labeled that way we cannot close our eyes from the reality. I would not like to discuss the numbers and statistics but look at the real examples of the problems and issues faced by the women in our country. I am of the firm opinion that the society in which women are respected will progress and prosper fast and reach greater heights, there would be peace in such a society but our family fabric is such that she is not considered worthy of that respect in many cases. I cannot openly share the identity of the women who have suffered in silence but get scared when I think that she could have been my mother also. When mere thought of this can make me shiver than think about the plight of the person who suffers the same day and night. There are women who are well educated, having masters degree and working in reputed organizations and apparently respected in the office by all but look at the same lady`s situation when she reaches home. The lady will have to work hard in her office and also be responsible for everything at home. She is expected to do all household work, look after the in laws, children and husband as well. I do not know in how many cases the husband extend proper help to the wife in day to day household work. There was a time when women used to stay home and do the entire work and the men were considered to be the earning member. That time it was still acceptable that women were doing almost entire work of the house but now the situation has changed and the women work hard while they study and also after getting a job they have to work harder. The man probably was respected earlier because he was the bread earner of the family but now the woman is contributing equally in meeting the expenses of the family ( though that should not be the only reason of the respect towards the women). The issues which really disturbed me are so burning that I could not stop myself from raising the same here. But I do not want those cases to become so apparent publically, hence finding it difficult to put them straight for you. We must understand that it is not physical assault which our women are subjected to but the psychological and emotional trauma is equally serious. There are cases where the husband does not do anything and the lady is working but still she is subjected to all kinds of abuse in the family especially by the husband. She is expected to do all the work and then go to the work place and do the same when comes back home. In many a cases even after doing so much she is not allowed to breathe freely because there are so many restrictions on eating and other desires she might have. Most of our women suffer in silence for the sake of the children and the reputation of the family in the society. The men can be friendly with anyone including the women but the same is not allowed for the wife. This is so ridiculous and negative when it comes to the equality among men and women. Actually it is a paradox! Men can very easily destroy the respect of the woman by casting a doubt on her character. A lady has infinite patience but that should not be tested unrestrained because she is also a human being and has emotions and feelings and wants to be respected and given proper place in the society. We must pay attention to this issue very seriously. I think laws only cannot fight with this issue but the mindset of the society should be changed specially the male members of the family must be made aware that female members are equally important and be respected. This cannot be preached but certainly be practised. If in a family the husband respects the wife then the children will automatically learn the same. Also the society also should change the mindset of the family tree only in terms of the male members. The female can also take your family name forward. The day society will think in this manner, many of the problems will be solved. Empowering women is very important but equally important is to respect them and realize that it is because of them that we progress well. I salute all women of the society for their patience and devotion to their families but the time has come that they assert for their rights also. They have been doing their duties so well but their rights are to be protected and made available to them by the society, if society wants peace and prosperity in future. The women should not give in to unjust demand of anybody but should stand firm to ensure that their respect and dignity is not compromised. I do not appreciate offensive approach and so we should try to teach our male children that they respect the girls and when they grow with such feelings and learning then I am sure real empowerment of the women will take place. This is an old saying that man and woman are two wheels of life cart and both have got to be equally healthy in terms of physical and emotional strength.
I shared this blazing matter with you all because there have been many issues which I came across in the past few years where I found women suffering in silence for the sake of the children and the family. Though there are many families in which the women are given due respect and that is the reason they progress so well. But there are so many others which require immediate attention of the society and their respect to be restored. Women should fight for their place in the society without dispensing their strength and the quality of patience, as she is the symbol of warmth, perseverance and endurance.

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